Thursday, May 23, 2013

to every thing there is a season


>>riding across the street and two houses down to feed the lambies<<


I fear that this silly little blog is dying a slow and painless death.

Or maybe it's just me.

Summer's almost here and I am pretty sure it will swallow me up and not even bother to spit out the bones.

I got to thinking the other day about my severe hatred for the season of sun and heat and sweaty foreheads. I wondered if there was such a thing as SAD (seasonal affective disorder) for summer. Is it possible that I'm not the only person who doesn't savor all the hot sunny days. Does anyone else out there not soak up all the long days of summer and all the popsicles and snow cones and blah blah blah blah BLAH?

Turns out I'm not alone. Summertime SAD. Hallelujah!

I read that article and just kept thinking yep! yep! yep! that's me!  

Disrupted schedules. Yep.
Body image issues. Yep.
Financial worries. Not any more than usual so that's nice.
The heat. Big Yep.

What's the solution? Beat's me. But it was nice to know maybe I'm not as big of a weirdo as I think.

***

Speaking of seasons, you know how people like to say that stuff about parenthood like enjoy them while they're little and they grow up so fast and it's just the season of life you're in and you'll blink and they'll be grown up and moving out and going to college and having babies of their own and you'll be sad and on and on and on?

I've decided this is the season of my life when I get nothing done alone. Like ever. Everything is narrated and questioned and observed. Everything.

This is the season when the only quiet down time I experience for the day is after 9:00 pm (or 10:00 pm if it's a night I actually went to the gym at 9:00 pm because going to the gym late at night does not count as quiet down time).

This is the season when I get to be happy about my kids growing and learning and saying cute and funny stuff (despite the fact that The Others like to bemoan the fact that their little darlings are growing up and they want to stop time and keep them babies forever...a concept I do not understand and maybe there's an article on WebMD about that one too? or I'm just a bad mom? whatever).

This is the season for me to just feel overwhelmed and worried and completely spent all the time. It just is. I get to just give and serve and listen until I'm empty. No refills. I can't think of better people to give and serve and listen to so I'll just keep on doing it until they don't need me so much and then boy, will I be sad that I was ever overwhelmed right? Yep. So who needs a drink? Who needs toast with the crust cut off (I know that's totally my fault for starting it but I do like to eat the crust so it's mostly working out for us). Who needs me to clip their toenails? Who needs something one minute after I sit down to rest my weary bones before starting dinner? Raise your hand. I'm here to serve because dang it, I love you.

This is the season for me to get used to their bedrooms being messy all the time because as soon as I waste my time sorting through old toys and throwing stuff away while they're at school, they're going to come home and play quietly in that room and it starts all over again so I really should stop wasting my time (except there's no throwing away anything when they're home because they want to save everything so it has to happen sometimes).

This is the season when I can take my kids swimming at 9:00 on a school day and have the pool all to ourselves. That's a good one. Danny only has a week left of kindergarten so the season of the lonely pool swimmers is about to come to an end. I hate a crowded pool almost as much as I hate summer.

This is the season when I get to wake up to snuggly kids in my bed instead of an alarm. Oh, this is glorious indeed. Sometimes I feel lazy but then I get over it. Remember how they grow up so fast? I know I'm going to have to wake up and drive kids places in the dark of morning eventually so for now, I'm very much enjoying the sleeping in and snuggling. Lazy schmazy.

***

One last observation and then I'm done.

My parents recently sold their house. 

The one they've lived in for almost 35 years.
The one I lived in from kindergarten until I graduated from high school.
The one that my kids only got to visit once.

I'm sad about it and then I remind myself that in 5 weeks Grama Bama and Grandpa will be three miles away instead of thousands.

To every thing there is a season.


2 comments:

Marisa said...

My blog is dying, too. I'm kind of ok with it. But I do still love your posts.

I was just wondering last week, when we had an 80 degree day, if there was a Summer SAD. Most people around me get energized when it's sunny. The heat and sun make me feel so drained! I just get tired and grouchy and want to go inside.

You're getting to the time when your kids are old enough to do lots of things on their own. I bet Danny could cut his crusts off with a butter knife. Put the drinks down low so they can reach them. I promise, the grass is truly greener on this side, where we direct from the couch while resting our weary bones. Give it a try.

And hooray for Grama Bama and Grandpa coming to stay!

Sell...Party Of 5 said...

This is the post I was telling you I loved so much.

Paul deals with Summer depression. I didn't know it was such a thing until 5 years ago.