my three-year-old deadheading my petunias whilst toting her baby
Here's what I'm wondering (besides "is it ok to post deep, thought provoking questions about motherhood instead of pictures and anecdotes of our recent summer vacation because I'm too tired to sort through everything and I feel like day to day stuff is too boring to blog about?")
You know those moms who do fun stuff with their kids all the time? The ones who take pictures off it all and blog about it and then say stuff about how they love spending time with their little ones because they're only little once and you've got to enjoy it and blah blah blah blah blah.
Those moms.
The fun moms.
Do they have housekeepers? Dishwashers? Weed pullers? Personal chefs? Laundry folders? Unlimited amounts of time, energy and patience? Kids who take three hour naps every day? Husbands who are independently wealthy and stay home all day too?
Do they not feel lazy? Is it just me?
What am I missing?
Do their kids know how to play by themselves?
When do they get anything done?
Are they going to stop doing fun stuff now that summer's over and their little ones are back in school? Mine aren't back in school. Too little.
Does this mean I have to keep trying to do fun stuff instead of folding laundry until they're both in first grade?
I build Lego stuff with Danny.
I pretend to chop him in half with my light saber.
I play tea party with Cate.
I read her books and eat the fake waffles she brings me.
I do stuff.
The fun part is that if Cate sees me playing with Danny she wants to play too. So I let her and then he gets sad that Cate's taking my attention. Same thing goes if I'm playing tea party or dolls or whatever other girly thing she comes up with. I can't win. Somebody ends up stomping off grouchy (sometimes it's even me).
If I don't clean bathrooms, wash dishes, fold laundry, sweep floors (I'd say scrub floors but I haven't done that in ages, who am I kidding?) at some time other than 9:00 at night when they're in bed then I'll be a crazy lazy mess of a mother.
And nobody wants that, now do they?
Plus, I've got to shower and get dressed too. I need time for that. Do I really have to wake up before the kids (and for some strange reason that's been earlier and earlier lately) or am I allowed to use their waking hours for that? I know they don't think I'm allowed because they either come into the bathroom while I'm taking care of business or pound on the door if I remember to lock it.
Am I crazy to think that this was easier when they were babies?
Am I just too old?
Is it too soon for another vacation?
Just wondering.
8 comments:
it was so much easier when they were babies, are you kidding??
It's not just you, I totally feel crazy AND lazy....and you totally get to shower during waking hours. That's what the tv is for, silly! To keep them entertained while you take care of you for 10 minutes. It has to be said, though, that I'm pretty sure my kids are easier now than they ever were as babies...
You play more with your kids than I do. One time in the overflow Ruth Hoyt got down and started playing with Isabella and Jane, pretending to be a Strawberry Shortcake with them. Jane looked at her and said, "You can't play! You're big!" You see? I NEVER play with them. At my best I might come up with something they can do but they'll be doing it while I do something else. I say no guilt. When I think back about my mom she was just wonderful, and I can't ever remember her playing with me. :)
My daughter likes to remind me that "I don't play with them", I like to do fun things and take them places but really we can't afford to do it every day, maybe once a week. And I like a clean house :), makes me a better Mommy. I often feel guilty but you know the staples commercial with the Dad going down the isles while they sing "most wonderful time of the year" yeah that is me. Like Ella said, no guilt, I don't remember my Mom playing with us either, that's why I had siblings :).
I think this is every mother's dilemma. My guess is those mom bloggers do something fun and take pictures (by the way, they're not really interacting fully if they're taking pictures, right?) and then they have to do all the work to edit and post those pictures. Who's playing with the kids then? They have times when they're not interacting with the kids, too. We all do. We have to. To get things done or just get FIVE MINUTES of quiet.
I cackle to myself every time I see my kids playing together. Muahaha. . . that was the whole reason we had a second child! My plan is working.
I could write more. My comments on your posts are always so long! If we lived closer, we could let our kids play together and talk for hours about how we don't have enough time to get other things done. ;)
Some women live to blog and some blog about life to document memories. The picture of Cate says it all. She has grown up with a mom that cares for her kids while they observe her work. Who wants to have a fake blog mom that is all about appearances? Not smart Cate. She wants to be just like you!
It's not you, my friend, it's the ages your kids are. It really does get easier once they are in school all day. Promise. The preschool years were some of the hardest of my life. Fortunately for everyone, I was not a blogger then. :-)
Yes, it's easier when they're babies and all you have to do is cuddle and feed them. (I never thought I'd say that.) That's why I keep having more! Some days I just like my baby better. I don't remember my mom ever playing with me, but I don't remember much before the age of 7 or 8 so who's to say she didn't? Just think, all of the time you spend playing with them, they probably won't remember anyway. Maybe that's why people blog about it, so they have proof.
Post a Comment